It is something to cheer you up in difficult times!
WILLIE
THE WORM by Harvey Fitton. Lancashire
dialect poet.
I
once knew a worm and I christened him Willie.
Its
really quite true, though it does sound silly.
I
used to meet him often in my garden plot.
And
we grew quite friendly, believe it or not.
His
skin was dark and shiny, his colour ‘mottled deep’.
And
he lived in a hole by the compost heap.
We
got so very friendly, that he began to talk.
We
often ‘passed the time of day’ on my evening walk.
He’d
tell me all the troubles that in his world abound.
Sometimes
he’d bob his head up, for he wouldn’t leave the ground.
Then
I’d bend down to listen, but I’d often to pretend.
(I
was never quite sure that I’d got the right end)
It
seems a certain Winnie (a winsome looking worm)
Had
captured his affection, with a wriggle and a squirm.
He’d
meet her every evening by the ‘potting shed’
And
tell her that he loved her and asked her to be wed.
He’d
sometimes take her presents (a tasty piece of –well-)
I
couldn’t tell you what it was – it had a funny smell.
They’d
have a shy little kiss, a squirm and a squiggle
Then
off on their way they’d contentedly wriggle.
Now
Willie loved her dearly, swore –‘I’ll get her if I can!’
Until
he met a rival worm, by name Sebastian
Sebastian
was a wicked worm, his heart was steeped in crime,
He
slipped and slurred and rolled, in every kind of grime!
He
noted Winsome Winnie as she glided round a rail
And
he was captivated by her wriggly little tail.
He
rudely then accosted her and followed in her train.
‘Why not
come and live with me in a lovely smelly drain!’
But
Winnie answered boldly-though her heart gave such a leap
‘I’m
going to live with Willie in his cosy compost heap!’
He
quickly then encircled her and gave a fearful hiss
‘I’ll
have you for my own!’ he cried, and roughly stole a kiss
Indeed said
Willie
angrily as he glided to her side
‘Kindly
just uncoil yourself!’ she is my promised bride.
‘Ho,
Ho!’ said
Don Sebastian as he shook his clammy head
‘Prepare
yourself for battle!’ ‘You’ll very soon be dead!’
So
Willie quickly oiled his coils on that dark and dismal dawn
And
all the worms for miles around collected on my lawn
Though
Willie was the stronger worm – I’d say that in a pinch
Sabastian
had the longer tail at least by half an inch
They
wrestled strongly with a will, the fight reached such a pitch
That
in the early morning light I couldn’t tell which was which
Their
coils entwined in angry zest, their battle cry ‘No quarter!’
And
each worm tried his wriggly best, the other worm to slaughter!
Sebastian
gave a sudden heave – but Willie gave a squiggle
And
wrapped his coils in bands of steel around Sebastian’s middle.
Sebastian
gasped and gurgled, a most peculiar sound.
But,
that was the end. That wicked worm lay dying on the ground.
A twisted mangled boneless pulp, with wounds no worm could heal.
And
the early bird came swooping down for a tasty little meal
I
never see poor Willie now. I don’t know where he’s gone
The
landlord took my garden to build some houses on.
So
if you see a worm, that goes with a wriggle
Then
gives a little squirm and a little squiggle
Just
bid him ‘Good Day!’ though it does sound silly
You
never can tell, it might be Willie.
